Today's news: Fergie pees her pants during show

Big girls do cry...


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Today's celebrity: Supernanny

Seriously, if I had to choose another mother than my own, I would definitely go for Jo Frost. I don't even have kids but I love her show, how she fixes problematic families and spoiled kids. Also, she is cool without being too sweet or childish.

I wish I could take her with me one weekday and do everything I usually do. Imagine: she could start an assessment on the the bus I usually take every morning, with all the screaming, annoying kids and their indifferent parents. Maybe she could even take a look at people at the office and teach them how to behave in a more professional way. I actually wish I could materialize supernanny for all these occasions where people have no clue on how to live amongst others. She would open her laptop: "Oh! I see Leticia is in desperate need of help. I'm on my way!"

Circus

Last Sunday Brazilians got to exercise their right as citizens and vote. Besides president, senator etc, we had to elect federal deputies for every state. Surprisingly (or not...) in São Paulo, the chosen deputy-most voted deputy in the entire country-was a clown. Not calling names or anything, the guy is a real clown. "Tiririca", as he's called, is quite famous in Brazil and started his career long ago as a singing clown. His first released song, "Florentina", became a hit, played on most national radio stations. Here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gIDyetR65JE. You are probably wondering why

it got big, since it's bad. We Brazilians know it's bad too, but we seem to have this fixation for bad, annoying stuff. Maybe that's why Tiririca was elected after all.

So, clown guy got more than one million votes, guaranteeing a seat at the parliament. Today, barely two days after elections, came the shocking news: Tiririca might not be eligible for the deputy position under allegations of being illiterate.

Let's see how it's going to turn out. He could actually be a good politician despite the fact he wouldn't be able to write a law project nor read any for a start. The clown drama is to be continued.




(Picture: slogan from his campaign, "Vote Tiririca, it can't get worse than it already is")

Keep walking...

Humm...take a closer look at the ladies.Would you really consider stop drinking?

Today's news: Lady Gaga appears at the VMAs dressed with meat

Note the strategic gap, so she would't smoke the ham, hehe.

Today's news: Lady Gaga appears at the VMAs dressed with meat

Note the strategic gap, so she would't smoke the ham, hehe.

Are you obsessed with the right things?

These are posters from an awareness campaign in Singapure against breast cancer. They want women to ask themselves if they are giving importance to the right things on their bodies: having a pimple or a big butt or having a bump in the breasts that could kill.

Ugly? No, just lacking some fixin'

So, if you think you're ugly, don't get sad. Get a surgeon!

Today's picture: in Lisbon

Look at the picture below and try to realize what is wrong with it:

These Portuguese workers had just finished installing poles on the sidewalk so that cars can't park there. How long do you think it will take until they realize where they parked their van?

(If you couldn't understand why Brazilians make so many jokes about the Portuguese being dumb, here is just a small parcel of the answer)

Comixed

 

 

Many more at www.comixed.com

Analysing the video: Chromeo, Don't turn the lights on

This is a quite cool song by a Canadian group called Chromeo. Watch and see if you like the beat.

http://feber.se/video/art/185749/smlbbig_musikvideo_med_chromeo/

Here are the top things about this video for you to check:

1-The singer ears.
2- What the hell is that guy spotting grapes?!
3-Everyone is wearing eyeliner.
4-Around 1:00 min you can see people sword fighting in the library (huh?).
5-The person appearing at 1:41 drinks too much coffee/tea.
6-When the singer smiles/spreads his teeth in the dark he looks just like Ronald McDonald (the clown). Creeepy.
7- SPOILER: At some points both guys become different people. I actually only noticed the singer becoming another person, but the keyboard guys gets replaced too. My eyes were so directed to the main focus in the image that I had to watch it other times to realize that the co singer becomes another man.

Egyptian bathroom

Mysteries of the universe: Ed Hardy, Abercrombie & Fitch

I don't know if it is a fever in your country too, but here in Sweden Ed Hardy T-shirts are selling like bananas. I wish I could know why. Yes, they are colorful and have some different prints too, but to pay 1000 Swedish crowns (many dollars) for a single T-shirt?! If it was somewhere else I could even think some I see are fake, but here in Sweden there is no falsification, so I believe every person I see wearing an Ed Hardy spent a considerable amount of cash on it.

Same thing, although not as common here in Sweden, is A&F. I see this f******  brand on people in every part of the world I go. Had never even been to one of their stores before. Then I recently went to London and thought I should finally have my debut. 

I walked into the store without really knowing if that was the store. The map said it was but there was no name, nothing. I actually thought it was a party because I saw some people outside talking and I could hear music coming from the inside. I almost left thinking it was not the place, but decided to check anyway. I happened to be right, it was a disco as well as Abercrombie & Fitch. Hundreds of people walking around, dozens of clerks minimally dressed (I even think I saw guys without shirts) and darkness. I am not kidding, it was almost a poetic portrait of hell: very loud radio music, people welcoming me in a smiley flirty way and soft red lights. I was waiting for the orgy amongst people in there to start and some souls to boil in a bubbly cauldron .

From what I could see from the poor lights, the clothes seemed very uninteresting. Casual stuff. Then I tried to check the price on one piece and after squinting my eyes for a while I finally saw it. It was enough to make me get out of there in a second.

So, judging by the cases above, it must be a status thing. People start buying because everybody else has one, so they can be as "cool". It's a great thing if it makes one happy. Even happier are the owners of these trademarks. I will remain unaffected by the power of marketing (at least for that matter) and happy too.

Hide your kids, hide your wife!

Have you heard about Antoine Dodson? Well, someone broke into his sister's bedroom and tried to rape her. Reporters came by later on just to find out that, more than a good story teller, Antoine is the biggest rapper of all time.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrWu13Uh2Yw&feature=related







(My credits to the person who auto tuned the song too)

Today's list: Latest movies review

Since I have been watching many movies lately I thought I should share my thoughts about them:

-REC 2: The first one was good, but this one should be called "FF". Instead of letting the cool bio-nature of zombies dominate the plot, they had to go deeper and increment it with "possessed by the devil" zombies. Give me a break.

-Toy Story 3: Well, what can I say about this one...Disney/Pixar hardly lets me down and it couldn't be different this time. Every time a new Toy Story comes up it's even better than the last one.

-Shrek 3 (or 4, 5, I lost count): This one was actually my favorite of all Shreks. They even added some shed a tear moments (Ha!Worked on me). Cool movie.

-Inception: The bad thing about this movie is that it eventually ended. It was so, so good. Seriously. I am not even a big fan of puzzle movies, I didn't like Matrix at all and could never keep track of who was attacking who in Star Wars, but this movie is worth a knot in the head. Not only the visual effects were great but the plot was so interesting too. If you don't like Leonardo di Caprio and his way of making every character look the same, ignore it at least this time and go watch it. Pretend it's a dream!

-Splice: This one had potential to be a good one. They even managed to get Oscar winner Adrien Brody to be in it. The idea is cool, a modern" Frankenstein", but from the beginning we all know it won't end nicely...

-Greenberg: Once and for all: comedy actors should not act in dramas! Please, Ben Stiller, Adam Sandler ("Funny people") try to understand that your thing is comedy! Have you wondered why these guys always acted in comedies and only comedies all this time? I have and now I know why. So here I am warning you not to watch this horrible attempt of cult movie with Ben Stiller (Do not watch "Funny People" either, it's just as bad).

Today's thing: Date site for muslims.

Careful with who is hiding under the veil!

Blondes have more money part 2

In one of my previous posts I forgot a big example that getting blond (er) is getting rich (er) in music industry, so here it goes:
This is Shakira when she started her career, singing in Spanish around South America:

...and this is Shakira after she decided to exchange the tropical areas for the real commercial fame in the US:

Told ya!

La mano de...

I know the world cup is over, but I had to post this one:

Harder, better, faster...blonder!

Have you realized how pop music celebrities turn blond the more famous they get? Maybe they get more famous because they get blond? It's a big mystery we might never solve. Meanwhile, here are some radical examples (I'd surely add more if I had more time to look for it today):

Quoting Heidi Klum: "You're out"

Yes, my dear blog friends, Brasil is out of the world cup.I had our flag hanging from the window, I screamed in the first goal, I did all the superstitious stuff we do and nothing helped.  After my momentary sadness, the only thing I could think about was Dunga, our coach (actually, our ex coach, since he has just been fired). I hope he survives when coming back to Brazil, 'cause he was already very criticized in the beginning of the world cup, imagine now that we are coming home without the trophy...
By the way, "Dunga" is the name of the weird dwarf from Snow White and the seven dwarfs movie. The one mute and a little bit dumb . Now I guess we know why he got this nickname....

"Heigh- Ho,Heigh- Ho, we're going home Heigh- Ho!

Cut from the same cloth

Have you realized how Eminem and Britney are similar? We are used to songs about second or third parties, like"She", "You are so beautiful" and so on, but not from Eminem and Britney. Most of the songs they sing are about themselves. I don't mean singing about their life experiences or anything, simply everything revolving around them. What they want, what they do, everyone watches them, they are the center of attention. Check out these minor examples:


Britney: 

"Overprotected": I can't help the way I feel
But my life has been so overprotected
I'm so fed up with people telling me to be
Someone else but me


"Let me be": Think that I can't stand on my own
It ain't my philosophy,
Won't you just let me, let me be?

"What it's like to be me": This is my game, my rules

And I can see, obviously,
Baby You don't know
What It's like to be me 

"Piece of me": Well, pretty much the whole song is only about her

"My prerogative": Everybody's talking all this stuff about me

Why don't they just let me live?

"Circus": All the eyes on me in the center of the ring

Just like a circus

"If you seek Amy": Love me hate me
Say what you want about me
But all of the boys and all of the girls are
begging to If You Seek Amy (Even when she sings about a third person, it's about herself!)

Eminem:

"I'm Shady": I'm Shady!!
.. And that's my name 

"My name is": My name is Slim Shady... I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off! (He must be some kind of rapper Jesus)

"The way I am": And I am, whatever you say I am

If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?
In the paper, the news everyday I am
Radio won't even play my jam

"The real Slim Shady": 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?

"I'm back": That's why they call me Slim Shady (I'm Back) 

I'm Back (I'm Back) (SLIM SHADY!) I'm Back

"When I'm gone": And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn

Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice

"Without me": 'Cause it feels so empty without me

Don't you agree? Pop 'cause it's egocentric or egocentric cause it's pop?

Today's thing: Vagina dentata!

A South African doctor developed the newest weapon against rapes in the country: a feminine condom with "teeth" that painfully grip the aggressor's penis in the moment of the penetration and can only be removed by a doctor.

The idea seems very interesting, but it got me thinking: if it becomes a hit in South Africa then every raper will start trying "the back door" first and so on. It's gonna end up with women using this condom even in their nostrils.
If you doubt it's real: http://www.antirape.co.za/
Tchau!

Sweden's royal wedding

As you might already know, the Swedish princess Victoria got married last Saturday. After dating the same guy for 8 years, she decided it was time to tie their knots.
The event changed Stockholm's routine for some days. Many streets were closed and the access to the city center was very limited. All for the security of the royal family and its guests for the big party. A very expensive and marketed party. To gather more tourists and attention, the Swedish government started some sort of campaign called "Love Stockholm" with the motto "Celebration of love". It was a whole week with limited edition items sales and activities related to the wedding. It was ok, but nothing very remarkable.
Europe's royalty came in person to see Victoria say yes and gosh, I need to say, the royalty is ugly! Expensive dresses and jewels could not make up for the fact that money doesn't always buy beauty. No good looking princes, some few good looking princesses and lots of decrepit royal grannies looking like pit monsters.
The worst of all this love celebration thing though, was that the wedding ceremony itself had no kiss. Can you believe it? A wedding without the kiss! I don't know if this is something very Swedish or very royal. Just seemed very un-lovefull.
After they were done with the church, it was time for us, subjects, to get some loving. The newly weds went around the city in a carriage to wave and thank us for being a part of their kiss-less celebration. I was actually there and even managed to take a pic of the princess, that turned out to be blurry. So I'll leave you with this picture of her hand instead. Hehe.

Today's news: Portugal 7x0 North Korea

 I wonder how that crying North Korean player reacted to this score.

Also, judging by the kindness of dictator Kim Jong, we can expect a very warm welcome home for the North Korean team.

Brazilian game party. Aff....

Yesterday I went out with some friends to a Brazilian party to watch Brazil's first performance in the World Cup.
The place was crowded, more Swedes than anything else and they even played (bad) samba. It was funny to be in that environment, I started to see all the good old stereotypes:

-Brazilian girls in short shorts despite the Swedish cold;
-Brazilian guys checking on girls like if they could eat them with the eyes;
-Good looking Swedes with ugly Brazilians and vice versa;
-Swedish guys expecting to hunt Brazilian girls;
-Swedish girls expecting to be hunted by Brazilian guys.

Past all that, we had to stand for the whole first half of the game, dodging sweaty armpits and long people, to be able to see something in the big screen they had there. Result: by the beginning of the second half, I was already on my way home.
I saw no goals, but at least Brazil won!
Next game I will watch at home though...

(By the way, did you see the crying guy from North Korea? Poor! Broke my heart)

Silly mourning

I woke up today and, as usual on weekends, ran to the Xbox to play some Red Dead Redemption. After some minutes of game playing, the console went crazy and the image got all messed up. So now I'll probably post a little bit more often, at least until it works properly again.
I gotta say that Xboxes are far from being the best consoles in the market. I had a Ps2 in Brazil and my sister guarantees it still works perfectly after at least 10 years of continuous use. But since I moved to Sweden I have been playing Xbox. First the older version, that also woke up one morning not wanting to work anymore and now Xbox 360, with the same kind of problem. I even got to know that there is an error like, if your Xbox 360 shows three red lights around the on/off button it means the definitive "death" of your console. What the hell!? Mine shows its first one right now.
As usual, Microsoft lets us down. Go Sony!

190 million hearts cheering together!

How are you preparing yourself for the world cup? Maybe you don't care much but, me, like every Brazilian, can't wait for its beginning. I actually envy the ones who can be in Brazil to watch it because it is truly magical.

Most people in Rio organize barbecue parties for days when we play. It's not very common to see huge screens everywhere on the streets, 'cause most everyone is indoors, partying and watching the game closely. The streets tend to get completely desert actually.

Besides decorating everything, we also paint walls, sidewalks, streets etc with football related figures and sayings.

Here are some pics of a street in Rio very known by its nice and extensive decoration: "Alzirão". It hardly illustrates it, so I recommend you to visit it if you are in Rio right now.

Since this is my first world cup outside Brazil, I managed to find a Brazilian party to attent to and watch the first game (15/06) with my compatriots in the best Brazilian style: football and samba!

Good luck to us all and play fair!

Week update

Since I haven't written for five days I thought I could update you and maybe even come up with some excuses for why I wasn't here when you needed:

-I was attacked by a Seagull: I wasn't even looking for trouble, just crossing the yard to get home when an angry mommy seagull came towards me in the best Hitchcock style. After running like a crazy hunchback, I noticed her  offspring on the floor, so, ok, I forgave her. But anyway, it traumatized me and made me absent from the computer...

-I am playing a new game: Trust me, it is a very very good one. For the Rockstar (the company) games fans, this one is a must. It's called "Red dead redemption" and it's a wild west based adventure that got me in its lasso. I need to try really hard to stay away from the xbox, otherwise I can spend almost a whole day playing it (which is double as bad when you live in Sweden and need to enjoy the few sunny days of the year in this season).

-I discovered a song: I heard it while I was in Brazil some months ago. They played it everywhere...but I had no idea of what it was called, no one had either and I couldn't even try to remember the lyrics 'cause they don't sing much in it. I just liked it very much. Sounds sexy and mysterious somehow. Less mysterious now though, that I found it on youtube. It's called "Stereo Love". Enjoy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-Z3YrHJ1sU

That's basically it. I will keep on updating you!

By the way, a small final protest concerning kids: 

Kids crying incessantly while mommies completely ignore it.

Giant kids riding carriages (sounds almost like something from a fantasy book) occupying the entire bus.

Ok, over n' out.

Life in Sweden part 2

Remember when I posted this picture to the left?
Well... the picture below was taken last saturday also from the same window from the same apartment...

Today's fable: The old lady, the mysterious underwear guy and the little dog in trouble