Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Today's evil review: Where the wild things are


I don't think we get to know where, actually. When I watched the trailler I really thought this movie had potential. Fantasy, creative looking characters and that taste of evil innocence, like you wonder when and how something bad will happen, since it is somehow a children's story. The thing is that this part never comes. The plot is poor, nothing interesting happens and I believe even those who love "weird movies" would get bored. There is also no empathy with the main character, a small boy.
The movie is based on a children's book and I wonder how similar they are. Nevertherless, I read that Warner Brothers studio was so unhappy with the director's first final version of the movie that they wanted to re-shoot the whole 75 million dollars project in 2008. The version on the theaters now was the accepted one...go figure!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Today's news: Curly hair gene discovered


No more babyliss. Scientists from Queensland, Australia, found out the gene responsible for curly hair. The discovery is expected to change the cosmetic world, since now there has been speculations on the creation of pills for developing hair curls. Cool isn't it?
-
-
-
-
-
-
I can almost hear Paris Hilton saying "Tinkerbell...guess what mommy bought you..."

Friday, December 11, 2009

Today's annoying thing: Loud breathing people


Sitting close to someone who, despite not being tired, breaks the silence and steals some of your oxygen with a very intense inhale/exhale action. If you've had that experience before you know how disturbing it is.


No air, no air...

Monday, December 7, 2009

Today's contradiction: New Moon


Have you realized that Kristen Stewart has that dull expression in every Twilight/New moon picture we see? Why?
Choose the best alternative:
1- Her character is not supposed to sleep well due to her relationship with a vampire.
2-Her character is lesbian.
3-She is actually trying to send an eye message to all teens: "Don't fool yourselves, they're gay".

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Today's pic: Hide it better


By the look on the guy's face and by the giant knife he is holding, if I was Rihanna I would get this finger out of my mouth and run away...fast!

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Today's news: Finnair offers silicon implants to costumers


A Finnish airline called Finnair came out with an interesting offer to their most loyal female costumers: silicon implants.

All the costumers need to do is gather mere 3.2 million bonus points which can be then exchanged into a breast augmentation surgery.

I wonder what the corresponding offer to men is...






Friday, November 13, 2009

Today's Evil Review: "Paranormal activity"


This new low budget "scary" movie started to get popular and so I decided to watch it. First of all, despite its name, don't fool yourself: there is no activity in it. You will spend eternal one and a half hour in front of the screen waiting for something...that never comes. Not even spirits decided to show up as extras.
The story is centered in a couple having paranormal problems in their house. Not only they decide to record everything happening around (god knows why characters love to do it in low budget movies) but also they do that in complete darkness. So even if there is something to see, give up, 'cause you will not see it.
On the other hand, this might be a good movie if you are one of those people who watch movies while listening to music and doing sudoku, all at the same time.

Well, since this is an Evil review, here is a small turn off list for "Paranormal activity":

-Boredom: Nothing happens.
-Give me a break: People go around in the middle of a scary night in a haunted house without turning on the lights!
-Love to play the stupid: Everybody knows the character shouldn't do "it" but the dummo does it anyway.
-Incredible hardwares: The camera batteries never end!

Turn on about "Paranormal activity":

-Hope: It proves that anyone with a portable camera and a bad plot in their hands can make millions with a movie.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Today's news: Steven Tyler leaves Aerosmith

I heard the band is already looking for a replacement. Rumors say that one of the following is likely to substitute Steven:

Friday, November 6, 2009

Today's pic: Beyonce's revelation


Judging by her expression I guess she had just seen this exact image on one huge screen at her show.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Today's mockery: U2 vs Germans


U2 will perform today in Berlin to celebrate 20 years since the fall of It's wall. Around ten thousand free tickets were available online for the fast people who managed to get one. U2, probably not happy for having to perform for free, took the piss out of the germans and made sure to place a huge wall around the show's location, blocking the view of many who thought they could take a look from outside.


"Ah, Bono! You always so ironic!"


Today's news: Fotographer captures a shark smiling

I also smile when I see food right in front of me...
-


Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Naked Chinese man flees lover's furious husband


You're probably making a huge effort to try and see his "things" in this picture. Well, read the headlines again and you'll see it's a waste of time...

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Today's news: Five year old Giuliano Stroe is world's strongest kid



Now look at his pic and picture his poor mom trying to make him clean his room, do his homework...

















"I told you, bitch, I don't want to! AAAAAAHHH!"

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Today's news: Human scanner starts operating in Manchester's airport


I don't know what gets my attention the most: the small package he is carrying around his thigh or the small package in the middle of his legs.
-

Friday, October 9, 2009

Today's news: Obama wins Nobel Peace Prize


And right now in heaven Mother Teresa is thinking: "Seriously! And I, who spent all those years in Calcutta...if I only knew it was that easy...tsc!"

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Today's news: Swedish lesbian city is a myth


Swedish travel agents have been bombarded with inquiries after a false story about a city in Sweden populated by sex-mad lesbians was reported by a major Chinese news agency.


Now choose the best alternative:
a)- But of course these news are fake. They were "made in China".

b)- Well, I hope Ellen Degeneres still have time to unbook her tickets.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Uuuuuurgh!

What best describes the pic?
1-If the egg is this big, imagine the size of the "cock".
2-The chicken survived.
3-The chicken now knows how you feel after days without going to the bathroom...

Monday, October 5, 2009

Back!




Hello everyone! Sorry for being so absent. I had much to do last week. Today I tried looking for some cool news to make fun of but all I want to comment on is that Rio de Janeiro (the city I come from!) is going to host the Olympics in 2016. Some of my friends who live there reported celebrations everywhere around. Totally understandable, since it means a lot to the country which is also hosting the FIFA world cup in 2014. See you there!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The ugly truth

Since singer Susan Boyle has been on TV there's been a marked drop in suicide bombing. Apparently, a lot of the terrorists didn't realise what a virgin looks like.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Today's news: Horse measuring 2,03 meters gets the title of world's tallest




















I hope the guy in the picture was lucky enough to get out of there before the tallest horse in the world got a hard on...
-

Friday, September 25, 2009

"I'mma let you finnish"

After interrupting Taylor Swift in the MTV's VMA, Kanye West decided to continue his saga with some other celebrities:












Friday, September 18, 2009

Friday, September 11, 2009

Whatever happened to...Kevin Richardson (Backstreet Boys)
















As you can see by the picture above, Kevin moved to Thailand and now teaches iguanas how to play the guitar.

-

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Achtung!


So, just like Elvis, Hitler is not dead. He came back with a new plan to kill thousands of people: spreading AIDS.
The idea behind this new campaign (photo) didn't please everyone. Some people say that it maculates the image of those who suffer from the disease, giving the impression that they are mass murderers who go around spreading the virus for evil fun.
Well, we can't say that the picture is effectless. Besides the real concept of trying to make people have safe sex, there are some other things we get to think about by checking it:

-The girl seems to be enjoying having sex with Hitler.
-Hitler doesn't mind having his pic taken while having sex.
-Hitler's arm is hot.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Today's news: "Depression will be the most common illness in 2030", according to the World Health Org.


In view of this comes the following equation :

x=depression
y= suicide
z= absense of sun

x+z= y
y + 2030= Not one single sould left in Scandinavia.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Break dance Open 2009

Seems like tennist Bjorn Phau, without much success, feels like starting a new career...